Gallows Nymph (STORY) Part 1. La Jolie Luxure

Though she had several kids and~ by all means walked like a tender lady of quality in public, for a long time the most notable men of Paris- and some urchins- ...and even Jews had knew that the "Madame" part of Madame Helene Marie Du Crete was rather negotiable. After all, her abominable marriage was for decades well known, and sighed over among many circles...a tragedy to be sure, though most could count themselves profitably happy about her woe. For it was precisely because of her hopelessly cankered marriage, Madame had became a rather most charitable woman. To many, this reputed "Nymph of Paris," performed a most public form of charity.

...as one can plainly recall from the many pamphlets that have riveted to her impending fate upon the hideous scaffold, that to her, "the kisses of any man other than her husband to her were~ to her cordial lips, rich and warm compared to cold water." 

Alas, since so much of Paris' vulgar populace already had hopelessly fixated all of their minds so inordinately upon such brutal topics as naked eros and thanos, and having seen that the woman is impossible to pass over in silence, perhaps now, it owes to us, the mob's distinguished and moral betters to give some critical context in regard to this "Nymph of Paris" with our own accounts. After all, Dear reader, the lovely sinner was known to many of us personally, and had been a most uncontrived and generous friend to us each. After having gathered all the piquant fragments which can satisfy your curiosity, we believe that we can awaken much in our readers by publishing today this whole fragment.

It was often said that in the wake of Madame Du Crete's famous sauntering gait many husbands would rustle like dry leaves in an autumn breeze, rattling and even falling, spirited away as if their souls were stolen by that wind. A wind that made dream bloom or bloom again. It was also common that in her wake there would be many raising of tall glasses in toast, usually among the rounds of the watchers. Though this was mostly to themselves. 

Those knowing, appreciative salutes with tall glass and goblets? Probably because for both watchers-  they would not have any difficulty picture her naked in the same exact image in both of their culpable heads. After all, both of them probably had seen the same familiar vision of loveliness during one of her night of heartaches, and naturally by extension, both doubtless recognized that like some...fans of a sort, they were each- and both the same pilgrims to the same fabled shrine. Perhaps by chance even the same secret itch of the most Venereal sort unites them all three, the watching idolaters and goddesses all.

For many, the shock was not that she was arrested, and thence sentenced- but rather such a loveliness like her could be consigned to be slain at all. After all, many who had finally approved that decree in signature had at one time or another- (several of whom we knew who currently sits in the King's Petite Chambre) had all once played her husbands, including the judges and several brothers and several sons of the King Himself. 

Alas, murderesses, even failed murderess personally known to them all like an inside joke cannot be forgiven. The King made his intention in declaring, that for the sake of domestic peace, Madame Du Crete must well deservedly loose her pretty head. 

This was thought unfortunate, for Mme. Du Crete, though no longer young, was still full of charm and fair, but the crime was so great, and though many of us, (even including the victim her Lord Husband who escaped his murder) had pleaded for her life to be spared before the King, she was sentenced to perish upon the scaffold before the whole of Paris. For which purpose, a scaffold- as you all must already know, had been ordered to be constructed at the Place de Greve Plaza. After which- as you all must already know too, the delinquent's pretty head would then...made available before the city hall of Paris to all. The stage, along with the disagreeable instruments had already been prepared, we can only hope that the actress herself now will be informed of her part. 

We can also assert with the absolutist of certainty, that the beauty herself would meet her very public end by the end of this week. The date, location, and circumstances of which we do swear upon our Christian souls. We even swear by your own subscription in our press. Even if you, Dear reader had only possessed the faintest glimmer of interest in regards to this odious affair, or that you yourselves have never partaken in this sort of sobering public festivities- we can already assess from hundreds of our imbedded and well connected sources within the high court that the best spots to witness such a once in a generation death of this renowned beauty had already been immeasurably overbooked by all who are interested. 

That all the windows along the town square with windows to watch it happen already had been riotously booked in advance by legions of lively fans and curious strangers. Who would know if your own preferred spot had already claimed by those who raced there with a cheaper hand of coppers?

Even if you do not come for yourself, think of your wives! It will be- probably as she had already told you this aplenty, a death that will be talked about for years if not ages. That when recalled, would be akin to when one heard the passing of one of the Majesties, and instantly remembered where they were that day and how they come to heard it. Surely you would not want to disappoint your lovely doves, why not satisfy her desperate pleadings and take her here with a good pack of young friends? Who knows, you may meet yet so many new friends and new loves. If not her, then think of your dear children, for nothing is more upright in such sobering displays, which from such examples could engraved so deeply into the bottom of their vulnerable souls, these works are very specific to suffocate seeds of such abominable crimes. Nothing is more beneficial for the public good, than these impressions!

In confidence, we have already procured knowledge that vendors, venues have already been appointed and well supplied in advance for the affair. Come before 2:0 P.M, for we cannot guarantee there will be a spot among likely tens of thousands. 

At least make arrangements two days before the venue to scout a perfect vantage for you and your family. That on Sunday, there will be viewing bleachers made around the scaffold so as to form an amphitheater. Depending on your preferences, the woman's flanks will be positioned toward the side that gave the greatest berth to the block. 

With this said, we wish to see some of you this Sunday. Gibbeting will be around dusk so try to seek out the beam where a tall nail- at least 3 pied du roi tall is pierced. There the ill- starred sinner will be guaranteed to be displayed. For those of you who would take advantage of this, consider your privilege that day, which holds all Paris cheap, our everlasting gift. 

Naturally, if you find our accounts lends much gratification to your worthy appetite, we would strongly welcome your enduring attention upon our future works following her upcoming and doubtless lovely death. An event of which- we promise that we have already been most cordially invited and had booked for in advance. 

We understand that such matters are laced with the vile distinction of carnal crime, some of which lay well beyond the pale of even fornicatrices. It should always be said that we only denigrate the sin and not the pretty sinner herself, for which we can be no harder than God. Like all brave and responsible men of much consideration, our attention upon the sordid affair and the woman are but of a public service so as to faithfully abridge, while grimly look on for your sakes. In our continuous and unvarnished expose regarding the sinner~ that as long as the King's harsh law permits the sordid curtain over her affairs to be left open, we, as ever vigilante and responsible disclosers-  shall relate to you the exposed woman in full details, no matter the depth of her lecheries and fornications, bravely enduring it for your sake. On this matter, you can count we shall remain your most inquisitive and unabridged of confidants.

~PRESSE DES MESSIEURS MÉCHANTS NON CENSURÉS

~(PRESS OF THE UNCENSORED BAD GENTLEMEN)